**This is a satiric post.
South Africa is doing far better in 2016. We have a healthy economy, and a strong constitution.
We have an amazing president at the helm of our progressive development.
The Rand is firm and strong. Rating agencies such as Moodys favour us tremendously – over all other African countries.
Security upgrades to the president’s compound were inserted within the budget cap of R3 million. In fact, had he not closely watched the construction, greedy suppliers would have ripped off the nation. The costs could have gone way over R110 million.
Des Van Royen has been a sharp and splendid minister of finance ever since he took over from Pravin Gordhan in 2009.
The Public Protector’s office is less busy. This means there is less corruption in government. It is a good thing Thuli Madonsela decided to renew her seven year non-renewable term. Even Mzwanele Manyi intemperately applauded her.
As no work is coming through to the Public Protector’s office, or rather there aren’t any complaints of corruption form the public; I fear her department’s skills set will grow blunt. The large budget which has been allocated to her office might end being returned to the treasury at the end of this accounting term.
Gwede Mantashe, the general secretary of the governing party – the ANC, affirmed that our country is in the hands of a proactive and ethical party. Like all executives of government institutions, registered organisations and companies are supposed (compelled) to report any hints of apparent corruption – he re-affirmed that if he hears of any degeneracy, he will immediately report it to the police as opposed to only instituting investigations within the party.
Unemployment levels are fast dying out. Soon enough, unemployment won’t have anywhere to sit – not even on a cooler bag.
Recently, the illustrious Gupta family released a statement that they will no longer accept business from government. They would like other smaller companies to have a share of the pie.
I cannot believe that the Deputy Minister of Finance, Mcebisi Jonas, has opted to resign after allegations that R300 was deposited into his Capitec account by a treasury service provider. If it is true, how can he allow a mere R300 put his integrity in jeopardy like that?
Good work to minister Mahlobo for going undercover in that spa to capture those Rhino horn guardians.
In other great news, Eskom will shut down all operations in order to clear its name.
And lastly, the SABC has dedicated 40 percent of its revenues to produce a new horror drama titled ‘When That Thing is Fading’. It stars The Magnificent Eight cast.